Someday, when

July 26, 2016

Living for Today Ember Grey

Truth: I am one hell of a planner. Call it Type-A, or perhaps just a strong love for lists and Daily Planners, but I truly am a pro. Christian would tell you that 90% of the time, I enjoy the planning more than the actual end result. Has that ever happened to you? Where you had more fun planning a party than you did at the party itself? There’s just something about the dreaming of it all and the crossing off of things (told ya- I am a list lover), and the anticipation. There’s nothing totally wrong with this, at least I don’t think, but sometimes I focus too much on the planning that I forget the whole point of it to begin with. I’m 32 years young but some days I still very much feel like that 19 year old girl, busy making plans for when I reach my 30’s. (Boy, that snuck up fast.)

It’s the strangest of mind games, feeling the rush and busyness that quickly becomes the day-to-day and before we know it, we’re not only planning things weeks and months out, but we start to actually plan for a date that doesn’t even truly exist:Β  Someday.

Someday I’m going to travel.

Someday I’m going to go for the job I really want.

Someday I’m going to be truly happy.

Someday I’m going to spend more time volunteering and helping others.

Someday I’m going to really love myself.


And then, as if to make ourselves feel better, we add one word to those statements to justify it all:Β  When.


Someday, when I have more money, I’m going to travel.

Someday, when I’m braver and less concerned about what other people think, I’m going to go for the job I really want.

Someday, when I get married, I’m going to be truly happy.

Someday, when I have more time, I’m going to volunteer and help others.

Someday, when I’m skinnier, I’m going to really love myself.


Do any of those statements sound familiar? I have said every single one of them at some point in my life, a few of them I held onto with a fierce grip – a grip that was ultimately false security. It’s easy to remain in our safe place of planning, in the cozy spot that is familiar, the space that encourages us to use the excuses that begin with ‘Someday, when’, and where everything feels exciting because there’s that hope that lives in a day that hasn’t found us yet. But I’m convinced that’s not just how we’re supposed to live.

It takes courage to soak up the space that keeps our plans far enough in the distance where there’s no need to take real action. It takes courage to delete the excuses from our talk, from our thinking. Because without the Someday, when – you’re making an actual proclamation.

I’m going to travel.

I’m going to go for the job I really want.

I’m going to be truly happy.

I’m going to volunteer and help others.

I’m going to really love myself.


When was the last time you said that last bit to yourself? Without an excuse, without an eyebrow raised? Is it something you need to do today?

It takes real courage to get rid of the Someday, when’s.

And you do have that courage, you know. This is your reminder.


EG signature

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  • This really speaks to me. I have been guilty of all of these statements at some point in my life, and am still guilty of most of them. The ones I’ve been able to move past took me making a firm choice that “this thing” wasn’t going to be like that anymore. It’s hard to do, but it’s wonderful to know it’s possible to move past the “whens.”

    • YES. Which could launch me into a whole other post! I think because I AM a planner, when I go for something and then realize I don’t like it, I often times forget that I don’t have to keep going with it just because I’d planned for it. It’s a constant reminder that it’s okay to change my mind.

  • As alway your posts come at the exact moment I need them. This was beautiful!

  • Such a great reminder! I often make excuses for not acting upon my ambitions. It’s important to remember that we already have all that we need to achieve our dreams.

  • I am such a planner. This really speaks to me. As a teacher, I really enjoy the beginning of the semester when I get to lay out all the assignments and arrange the deadlines, but absolutely hate the execution of it all. And in my personal life, I’m definitely a “someday” thinker. I needed to read this today.

    • πŸ™‚ I almost became a teacher… and I’m sure that would have been me as well!

  • Jae

    My mom used to tell me this all the time, and since I dropped the “someday” in my thoughts, I find that great things are happening! It’s not like magic, though, because you still have to work for whatever it is you desire.

    • YES- you are so right. There’s lots of work involved!

      • Jae

        It’s one thing to think the right things; working towards whatever that is you planted in your head to achieve or do is another. πŸ˜‰

  • This was definitely written for me! I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately since I’m hurdling towards my 30th birthday, and you know how an impending birthday has a way of making you reevaluate your life. Great one!

    • Oh. girl. I feel you on the 30 thing! You know what helped ease me into it though? A big party with my closest friends πŸ˜‰

  • I truly try to live my life thinking about this. If we aren’t careful – the someday may never come. Such perfect words Emily!!! XOXO

  • This is definitely where I get stuck. The daily routine, however unfulfilling, soothes my anxiety so it feels ok, even ideal, when it’s really not. Thanks for the reminder, Emily!

    • I could definitely see that, Jess. It will be different for all of us… sometimes even little baby steps into something different or new or really wanted makes all the difference πŸ™‚

  • Mmm, I’m struggling with this today. K just got news that he might get to travel around the world for his business. While I’m SO happy for him, it’s just a reminder of how lackluster my job is and how I have no passion for what I do 8 hours a day πŸ™ I’m so tired of saying, “Someday, when…” in regards to my employment. *sigh*

    • That would be hard no doubt! Perhaps it’s time for you to look into making a new step?!

  • Christian Matthew Cullen

    Thank you for the reminder. You are such a beautiful and kind soul πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚ *wink*

  • Thank you for this. You are such a beautiful writer and every time I read one of your posts my heart soars a little bit. xx

  • This is really hitting home today. Thanks so much for sharing this.

  • I really needed this post today, thank you for sharing β™₯

  • I needed to hear all of it this week. Thank you.

  • Always love a great reminder! Thanks for sharing Emily!

  • chall1018

    Give me all the planning and all of the lists. It’s my jam. I love this post, friend. I was just thinking about this the other day. I was doing some blog planning about travelling and started dreaming about all of the places I hope to β€˜someday’ visit. And then it made me think about how life is too short for β€˜someday’. Make it happen. Do what makes you happy. Make those memories.

    • YES. I’m with you! And I’m excited to read about your upcoming traveling adventures! πŸ˜‰

  • This is such a great reminder. This whole summer is nearly over and I haven’t done half of the things I planned to do! I think it’s time for me to get out and enjoy summer before it’s gone.

    • Oh gosh, this summer absolutely FLEW by! Hope you’re finding some “extra” time! πŸ™‚

  • This is so true! It’s one of the biggest lessons I’ve learned recently.

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  • So true! I am a type A girl too, I feel itchy when I don’t have my planner!